Chapter 2

When He Gu woke up, the sun was already high in the sky.

The sun was shining so hot on his face that He Gu opened his eyes. Feeling a heavy arm around his waist, he grabbed it and quietly lay it over his heart. Then he turned his head around to look at the man on the other side of the pillow.

Song Juhan was sleeping soundly, his messy hair hanging down the side of his face. His long lashes casted shadows over his eyes and face, and the side of his nostrils was moving lightly. A quarter western blood gave Song Juhan’s features the depth of a Caucasian and the mystery of an Eastern man. It was a face that could easily drive people crazy.

He Gu once spent a long time pondering whether he liked Song Juhan because of this face. He was an engineer. He was good at thinking over things, and he was willing to think about it. He would even use various examples and hypotheses to consolidate his own thoughts. Later, he came to the conclusion that even if Song Juhan didn’t have this face, his background, status, talent, rich experiences, and mature social skills, he could still easily attract people. That superiority and noble aura was something that could only be forged from the bones of Song Juhan’s class. This proud son of heaven was very capable of attracting people’s worship. In He Gu’s current state, he might be able to resist Song Juhan’s little moves. However, his younger self could never.

Only those who really knew Song Juhan would know that he was highly intelligent and utterly interest-oriented. His knowledge of Song Juhan was probably second only to Song Juhan’s parents, because Song Juhan never pretended to be a gentleman in front of him, or rather, didn’t care to pretend.

He Gu just watched him like this. After watching for a long time, he moved as he was tired of keeping a stiff posture.

This time, Song Juhan woke up and yawned as he looked into his eyes, “What time is it?”

“Ten-thirty.”

Song Juhan opened his eyes sharply. “Fuck! Why didn’t Xiao Song call me?”

Xiao Song1 – not a surname. It means small or little, and is added to a name as a way of expressing familiarity. The “Song” here is also a different character from the “Song” in Juhan’s surname. was Song Juhan’s assistant.

Song Juhan looked to his left and right and said unhappily, “Where’s my phone?”

He Gu got out of bed, went straight to the living room, then soon returned with Song Juhan’s phone.

Song Juhan took the phone and saw that the battery was dead. He slammed it down on the quilt and cursed. “Give me your phone.”

He Gu handed him his phone, and Song Juhan dialed Xiao Song’s number. “Hey, yes, I’m here at He Gu’s… How are things? Well, I missed it anyway. Let’s do it some other time. You figure out how to explain.” After speaking on the phone, Song Juhan fell back on the bed.

He Gu said, “What’s wrong? Did something happen?”

“En,” Song Juhan said unhappily. “Go get something to eat.

He Gu put on his clothes, first charged Song Juhan’s phone, and then went to the kitchen to prepare breakfast.

When Song Juhan came out after washing his face, breakfast was already on the table. Song Juhan sat down and ate without saying a word, not at all seeing that He Gu was still busy in the kitchen.

By the time He Gu put the fried eggs on the table, Song Juhan had already eaten most of the food. He extended a hand and said, “Bring me my phone.”

He Gu went to take his phone that could already boot and gave it to him. 

Song Juhan tapped on the screen, and a WeChat message popped up. A very nice female voice said coquettishly, “Why didn’t you come back to me? I’m so sad.”

As Song Juhan ate, he returned indelicately, “I’ve been busy lately.”

He Gu’s grip on the chopsticks unconsciously tightened. His Adam’s apple drummed up and down as he quietly ate his congee with his head down.

The two of them exchanged a few words. That woman’s voice was very lovable and charming, while Song Juhan’s face was expressionless as he dealt with her, making people’s heart wince2心里发毛 – to feel nervous.

After eating the congee, Song Juhan said casually, “Do you know her voice?”

He Gu shook his head.

“Oh, I forgot. You don’t listen to much music. There’s a newcomer who recently became popular and is pestering me to write songs for her.”

“Have you slept with her?” He Gu asked unconcernedly. It wasn’t that he didn’t listen to many songs. He had listened to every single one of Song Juhan’s songs countless times; he just didn’t listen to anyone else’s.

Song Juhan shook his head and said contemptuously, “Who knows if she’s clean.”

“Then why even bother with her?”

“My dad wants to make her popular. She has quite a unique voice, but wanting me to write songs for her?” Song Juhan sneered. “I’m paid lots of money for writing songs.”

He Gu said nothing.

Song Juhan looked at He Gu and smiled mockingly. “But anyone who gets close to me has to want something from me, right?”

“I also want something.” He Gu wiped his mouth and looked at him faintly. “I want your face.”

Song Juhan laughed out loud.

He Gu also joined in laughing. Song Juhan thought that He Gu was no different from others, fancying his face, his name, and his money. He Gu never explained anything, because such a relationship of “mutual benefit” was what Song Juhan wanted.

Besides, his feelings would just be a cumbersome joke to Song Juhan, and he didn’t want to humiliate himself.

He didn’t speak out of turn, didn’t pester, didn’t make trouble, and didn’t resist. That way, Song Juhan wouldn’t get sick of him. Until one day Song Juhan got tired of him, they should be able to keep this relationship going for a while. If they weren’t even s*x friends anymore, then for the rest of his life, he would never have the chance to come in contact with the man again.

After the meal, Song Juhan made another call, probably to the driver.

He Gu cleaned up the kitchen and turned on his tablet. First, he spent over a thousand yuan buying a bunch of the latest licensed games online. Afterwards, he started watching TV.

His current 48-inch TV was bought two years ago, and even now, it was the larger size in home TVs. Being so busy with work, he seldom watched it. Only Song Juhan would come to play games on it. This TV had also been changed for Song Juhan. Actually, not just the TV. He Gu grew up in an ordinary family and didn’t have high demands in the quality of life. Anything high-grade in the house must have been prepared for Song Juhan who would come from time to time. Now the market had just launched a 65-inch TV. It looked quite imposing, but it was very expensive. It cost more than 40, 000 yuan. He Gu contemplated for a while in front of the computer, but in the end, still placed an order.

With a move of his finger, two months worth of salary was gone.

He Gu was a little distressed, but also thought that it was nothing. The reason to earn money was to spend it, and the reason to spend it is to be happy. As long as he could see Song Juhan, he would be happy.  Besides, he was alone and rarely spent money. He would never marry in the future, let alone have children, so what was the point in keeping the money.

Song Juhan returned after the phone call. He stretched out his waist and lay lazily on the sofa. “He Gu, come give me a head massage.”

He Gu put down the tablet and sat next to him. He placed Song Juhan’s head on his lap and rubbed his temples with moderate force.

Song Juhan closed his eyes and hummed softly, looking very comfortable.

The corners of He Gu’s mouth couldn’t help but turn up. There was an urge to bow down and kiss that smooth forehead. He whispered, “You’re preparing for a concert, right?”

“En. I’ll try to keep it to a minimum in the future. It does get the money coming, but it takes too much effort.”

Song Juhan was not only a popular singer, he was also a very talented songwriter. He was good-looking, could sing well, and at the same time, write good songs. There were only a handful of such people in the Chinese music world. So many people rushed to beg him for a song, because being able to sing a song written by Song Juhan indicated having a place in the circle or having a donor willing to throw money to make them popular.

He Gu gently smoothed his hair, “I know you prefer to write songs.”

Song Juhan snorted and yawned. Then, as if he suddenly thought of something, said, “Hey, guess who I saw the other day.”

“Who?”

“That boyfriend you had in college. He’s back in the country.”

He Gu was startled, his hand pausing. He covered up his emotions and said, “Feng Zheng? You know he wasn’t my boyfriend.”

“Oh, then what were you? Friends with benefits?” Song Juhan laughed. “No, you were still a virgin when you and I got together.”

He Gu said flatly, “I said we were just friends.”

Song Juhan sat up from the sofa and narrowed his eyes at him. “He’s doing well now. He didn’t go to his family’s company when he came back, but instead went on a venture capital campaign. When the company was working on a new movie set, it was him that came to discuss. He was quite polite when he saw me, not at all as impulsive as he was before… Oh right, he also asked about you.”

“Oh.”

“Aren’t you curious about what he asked?”

He Gu shook his head, somewhat distraught. An elegant and noble face appeared in his mind. If it weren’t for Song Juhan, he and Feng Zheng might have…

“He asked if we were still together.” Song Juhan raised his chin and stared unblinkingly at He Gu, taking in all of his micro expressions, “Guess how I answered him?”

He Gu’s tone was flat. “It doesn’t matter.”

Song Juhan chuckled. “I said that you were still a part of my harem. The look on his face was quite marvelous.”

He Gu frowned. He got up and walked to the study.

Song Juhan pulled his wrist with a somewhat rough force. His expression was also quite arrogant. “What’s wrong? Not happy, huh?”

“No, just not interested.”

Song Juhan stood up, pinched his chin and laughed lightly, “Stop pretending. Your eyes changed once you heard his name. Back then, because we were together, that brat…”

“We haven’t been together.” He Gu looked up at Song Juhan.

Song Juhan was stunned.

He Gu laughed. He pointed at himself, then pointed to Song Juhan. “What we are is not called ‘being together,’ and I’m not some member of your harem. Do you really want to talk with me about our relationship? Does it even matter?”

Song Juhan loosened his hand and his tone went cold. “It doesn’t matter.”

He Gu nodded. “I still have some work to deal with. Go play some games and just call me when you need something.”

He Gu entered the study without looking back. He had just sat down to catch his breath when he heard the door slam. He sighed heavily and scratched his hair irritably.

Why bother? What was the point of arguing just to show off some eloquence when it was so rare for Song Juhan to even come here? After all these years, it wasn’t like he didn’t know what kind of person he was.

He Gu was somewhat annoyed. From the bottommost drawer, he took out the cigarette hidden underneath a notebook. Song Juhan wanted to protect his voice, so he never smoked and also didn’t like the scent of smoke. However, He Gu often stayed up late when working on projects, and he sometimes couldn’t carry on without smoking. Hence, he tried to smoke as little as possible, hardly ever at home and especially didn’t let Song Juhan know.

After a puff, the taste of tobacco poured down his nose and into his stomach. He had never actually liked the smell of smoke, but its rough and raw stimulation was really refreshing.

He Gu walked to the window, just in time to see Song Juhan getting into a car. But before the driver could close the door for him, he slammed it hard that the driver shrank back in fright.

Looked like Song Juhan was in a very bad mood. He Gu thought it was quite funny. Back then, it was Song Juhan who humiliated Feng Zheng, and it was also him who had played with him. He was obviously the one who had won in one strike3旗开得胜 – Literally, to win a victory on raising the flag. To succeed right away.—no, Song Juhan had always been the victor. From the moment of birth, this man was destined to have everything go his way4要风得风,要雨得雨 – To want the wind and rain and get them. He always stood high and mighty, enjoying all the good things that ordinary people couldn’t even have the least bit even if they’d struggle all their lives.

So why would Song Juhan be upset when the events of that year were brought up?

It was probably because of his attitude just now. Song Juhan was used to getting a hundred responses to a single call. In his knowledge, people weaker than him could only act servilely5摧眉折腰 – literally, to low one’s eyebrows and stoop; to bow and scrape. He Gu had also been very tactful and obedient. When he occasionally couldn’t restrain himself, it surely annoyed Song Juhan.

He really shouldn’t have.

When he finished smoking, he returned to his desk and turned on the computer to work. He was a construction engineer. His work was cumbersome and his responsibility was big. He himself led a team of nine people and worked hard in state-owned enterprises for six to seven years. Taking into account the salary, project bonuses and year-end bonus, he could get five to six hundred thousand a year, which could also be regarded as a small achievement. But growing close to thirty, the long nights and overtime work had started to strain him a bit.

He stared at the complex structural diagram and felt a little tired. Suddenly, he remembered Song Juhan’s words telling him to do a small business or something.

He was a very boring person. He didn’t like to talk and socialize, so he had never thought about changing careers before. Creating a building out of nothing required serious and meticulous data and theory to back it up. These things had formed a fixed science over the thousands of years of humanity constantly studying and practicing them. If he was careful and professional enough, he wouldn’t make any major mistakes. He knew he was suited to such dull, routine work, and not to work that required creativity, for the fewer uncontrollable variables there were, the safer he felt.

However, people would change, whether actively or passively, and he did start to consider a career change in the past two years. The main reason was that he was getting too stressed. It wasn’t like he couldn’t take it. He was just afraid of getting old too fast, but he wasn’t afraid of old age either. He was just afraid of… afraid of Song Juhan no longer getting hard to him. No matter how busy he was at work, he insisted on keeping fit. He worked overtime until he was dizzy and didn’t dare to eat midnight snacks. One winter, when his skin was dry, this engineering man who only ever smeared Dabao6大宝 – a brand of skincare products, but He Gu is probably referring to its lotion. on his skin summoned the courage to learn about skin care products. He also wore clothes from famous brands he couldn’t even read the name of. All these were for Song Juhan. After working for seven years, he had little to no savings. Unconsciously, he seemed to have always been living for others.

If he wanted to change careers, Song Juhan would definitely help him. Song Juhan was very generous when it came to money. The Land Rover he was driving now, and this suite in the Third Ring7Third Ring – Beijing has five circular highways named Second Ring to Sixth Ring, with the Second Ring surrounding the city center, and the Sixth Ring in the outskirts of the city. The most expensive houses, generally speaking, would be inside the Second Ring, and they’d get cheaper as its location spirals outward.—they were all given by Song Juhan. He Gu had never refused this. He received them so Song Juhan wouldn’t get suspicious. He often consoled himself that, even though Song Juhan was stingy in giving affection, he wasn’t at a loss. He had liked Song Juhan for ten years, slept with him for six, and even managed to earn a luxury car and a grand residence. What was there to feel sorry about? If it were anybody else, they would have woken up laughing in their dreams.


Translator’s Corner

Song Juhan, twirling his hair: Hey, guess what… I saw your ex-boyfriend today

He Gu: Oh.

Song Juhan: Aren’t you curious? Back then, because we were together…

He Gu: But we haven’t been together.

Song Juhan: ( ̄■ ̄;)

He Gu:

Song Juhan: ヽ(*`゚Д´)ノ

Song Juhan, internally: What do you mean we haven’t been together?!! *angry confusion*

Lizonka, eating popcorn: Nom nom nom


**✿❀ translated by Lizonka ❀✿**
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